I don't think this guy has really built or broken many habits. None of what he says is wrong per se, it's just wordy. You don't need such a deep understanding of the brain to build/break habits. You just need a reason.
If you really wanted to do that habit or get rid of a habit, you just would.
Most of you live high agency lives and are making decisions every day that are creating your life exactly how you have decided to make it. A lot of stuff feels "hard" but you just don't want it bad enough.
One example is how easy it is for 99% of women to quit social drinking when they get pregnant. These same people, without such a clear and strong motivation, would probably "slip up" and struggle with 9 months of sobriety.
I'm just doing a reread of Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg (one of the OG researchers on the topic). It's really good, and I'm already thinking of dozens of ways to apply this to myself and my kids. (He presents his framework as a model for human behavior, not just what we normally think of as habits.)
I think the key with any kind of self-help advice or book is that you have to study it, not just read it. I plan to be working with this book for at least the next six months. I read too many other "inspirational" books that didn't have a lasting impact; the first read is just research to decide whether it's worth devoting time to. Then the real work begins.
I made flash cards when I read atomic habits as an exercise as I wanted to put some of the ideas from Andy Matuschak to the test. I remember and have internalized more from this book than any other self help book I have read. I can barely remember the titles of the other books I've read.
For some reason, I never read a self help book like this again despite how successful it was.
I have finally been able to form a habit that I wanted for more than a few decades and the book which helped me finally get it was "Awaken the Giant Within" by Anthony Robbins. This was my third or so reading of the book and this time it clicked! It's a bit dense book which seems to have aged well (and you may have to look past some of marketing for his other events).
"Tiny Habits" by BJ Fogg is another one which I find very useful. Just the basic idea of having tiny/baby steps to take is a powerful one.
"Loop Habit Tracker" app is a great app to keep track of your habits especially the ones where you want to record yes/no responses. It's free app available on android (I am still looking for something similar for iPhone for my wife!).
Getting up early in the morning! It's not a big deal for those who can get up easily, but I struggle to get up even at 8 AM and then have to rush things. I have also tried "The 5 AM Club" by Robin Sharma and excellent "The Miracle Morning" by Hal Elrod but to no avail. Currently, on a 57 day streak! Please don't ask what time I get up as it's still late from the point of view of morning people :)
"Error 1034: The host (alexy.tech) resolved to an IP address that the owner of the website does not have access to."
is what I'm seeing after clicking that link, it seems to work fine for others in the comments?
I understood it as "do the bad habit, regret it, do a new good habit right afterwards." The aim is to rob the bad habit of whatever reward is attached to it and mentally transfer the reward to the good habit instead.
How about a third mindset, where after a bad habit, I do a good habit and feel that my bad is compensated by good one?
It will continue to encourage subconsciously that bad habits are o.k. if I do something else to compensate it.
For a simple example, I eat a lot of sugar and then do a 10minute exercise. Then feel good about it that my sugar eating is fine, as I will exercise afterwards anyways. But the exercise is separated from any rewards or motivation and will likely often get skipped when my willpower is low(time when bad habits set their claws on mind).
My go-to for habit formation/breaking stuff is "Atomic Habits" by James Clear, highly recommend. It's one of those books I find useful to re-read every few years.
This is the only self help book that ever actually helped me.
Also there was one about habit forming that focused heavily on the power of compounding returns in terms of habits. Cant remember the name, if anyone can help me out, but that one was great too
I’ll echo this, I found Atomic Habits to be one of the only self help books whose strategies I actually use on a daily basis. Required a lot of work but I really improved myself after first reading this book.
Although I don’t agree with everything the author says (particularly his unrelated political views) I use Scott Adams’s “systems beat goals” idea (from “How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big”) almost every day.
“List six habits you wish to adopt, assign them to different times of the day, and aim
to consistently perform at least four.”
SIX? Um, how about we start with, like, one?
That aside, a concise article with good advice IMO, but I would add “find a partner and be accountable”, especially for eliminating addictive / tempting bad habits or replacing them with good ones.
>? You've requested a page on a website that is part of the Cloudflare network. The host (alexy.tech) resolved to an IP address that the owner of the website does not have access to.
I don't think this guy has really built or broken many habits. None of what he says is wrong per se, it's just wordy. You don't need such a deep understanding of the brain to build/break habits. You just need a reason.
If you really wanted to do that habit or get rid of a habit, you just would.
Most of you live high agency lives and are making decisions every day that are creating your life exactly how you have decided to make it. A lot of stuff feels "hard" but you just don't want it bad enough.
One example is how easy it is for 99% of women to quit social drinking when they get pregnant. These same people, without such a clear and strong motivation, would probably "slip up" and struggle with 9 months of sobriety.
I'm just doing a reread of Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg (one of the OG researchers on the topic). It's really good, and I'm already thinking of dozens of ways to apply this to myself and my kids. (He presents his framework as a model for human behavior, not just what we normally think of as habits.)
I think the key with any kind of self-help advice or book is that you have to study it, not just read it. I plan to be working with this book for at least the next six months. I read too many other "inspirational" books that didn't have a lasting impact; the first read is just research to decide whether it's worth devoting time to. Then the real work begins.
I made flash cards when I read atomic habits as an exercise as I wanted to put some of the ideas from Andy Matuschak to the test. I remember and have internalized more from this book than any other self help book I have read. I can barely remember the titles of the other books I've read. For some reason, I never read a self help book like this again despite how successful it was.
Seconded. I picked up a copy a few years ago when Costco was selling it. It’s pretty good and seems based on fundamentals and actual research.
I have finally been able to form a habit that I wanted for more than a few decades and the book which helped me finally get it was "Awaken the Giant Within" by Anthony Robbins. This was my third or so reading of the book and this time it clicked! It's a bit dense book which seems to have aged well (and you may have to look past some of marketing for his other events).
"Tiny Habits" by BJ Fogg is another one which I find very useful. Just the basic idea of having tiny/baby steps to take is a powerful one.
"Loop Habit Tracker" app is a great app to keep track of your habits especially the ones where you want to record yes/no responses. It's free app available on android (I am still looking for something similar for iPhone for my wife!).
if you don't mind sharing, what was the habit?
Getting up early in the morning! It's not a big deal for those who can get up easily, but I struggle to get up even at 8 AM and then have to rush things. I have also tried "The 5 AM Club" by Robin Sharma and excellent "The Miracle Morning" by Hal Elrod but to no avail. Currently, on a 57 day streak! Please don't ask what time I get up as it's still late from the point of view of morning people :)
Streaks is similar on iOS, but unfortunately not free.
Thanks for the suggestion. One time payment is not a problem for such apps (though not a big fan of subscriptions). Will try it out.
"Error 1034: The host (alexy.tech) resolved to an IP address that the owner of the website does not have access to." is what I'm seeing after clicking that link, it seems to work fine for others in the comments?
Me too, according to [1] from 2022 its likely because they've got a misconfigured DNS record?
[1] - https://dashways.com/blog/cloudflare-error-1034-edge-ip-rest...
EDIT: Its available on Archive.org:
https://web.archive.org/web/20241001232008/https://alexy.tec...
Is the webarchive snapshot complete?
I saw people in the comments referencing 4-6 habits but I don't see it in the snapshot. EDIT: nvm found it in the text.
> Instead of relying solely on penalties for engaging in a bad habit, introduce a positive action right after to replace it.
This seems counterintuitive as I would expect this to reinforce the bad habit. No citation or explanation given. Any ideas?
I understood it as "do the bad habit, regret it, do a new good habit right afterwards." The aim is to rob the bad habit of whatever reward is attached to it and mentally transfer the reward to the good habit instead.
How about a third mindset, where after a bad habit, I do a good habit and feel that my bad is compensated by good one?
It will continue to encourage subconsciously that bad habits are o.k. if I do something else to compensate it.
For a simple example, I eat a lot of sugar and then do a 10minute exercise. Then feel good about it that my sugar eating is fine, as I will exercise afterwards anyways. But the exercise is separated from any rewards or motivation and will likely often get skipped when my willpower is low(time when bad habits set their claws on mind).
My go-to for habit formation/breaking stuff is "Atomic Habits" by James Clear, highly recommend. It's one of those books I find useful to re-read every few years.
This is the only self help book that ever actually helped me.
Also there was one about habit forming that focused heavily on the power of compounding returns in terms of habits. Cant remember the name, if anyone can help me out, but that one was great too
The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy?
Preach! "Atomic Habits" is the only self-help book that I can recommend for everyone regardless of their particular life circumstances.
Wanted to buy an audio book, but some reviews there suggest that printed version is better. Will audio book work?
I’ll echo this, I found Atomic Habits to be one of the only self help books whose strategies I actually use on a daily basis. Required a lot of work but I really improved myself after first reading this book.
Although I don’t agree with everything the author says (particularly his unrelated political views) I use Scott Adams’s “systems beat goals” idea (from “How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big”) almost every day.
Just a heads up I had to go on VPN with a US IP for this to load, strangely a resential UK one didn't
“List six habits you wish to adopt, assign them to different times of the day, and aim to consistently perform at least four.”
SIX? Um, how about we start with, like, one?
That aside, a concise article with good advice IMO, but I would add “find a partner and be accountable”, especially for eliminating addictive / tempting bad habits or replacing them with good ones.
Looks like the article is saying goal of 4 out of 6 is better than just setting 1 goal because missing 1 out of 1 really demotivates you.
Hmm...
>? You've requested a page on a website that is part of the Cloudflare network. The host (alexy.tech) resolved to an IP address that the owner of the website does not have access to.
I'm getting the same thing. Might be a country restriction thing? I'm in Canada, for example.
Same here, trying from UAE